Premier League: Our Expert Predictions for the 2022-23 Season
It’s time for Premier League football!
That’s right, folks. The 2022/23 English Premier League seasons kicks off this weekend and, as is now tradition in these parts, we’ve gathered our finest footballing minds and Trey Daubert to give you, Dear Reader, their predictions for the upcoming campaign.
We’re going to hold toes to the flames, as well. We’ll check in on these predictions at both the half way point of the season as well at the campaigns end so that you can marvel/chortle at our writers predictive powers.
Enough preamble; let’s get to it!
Let’s start at the top. Who wins the league?
Jarrod Prosser: This is surely Manchester City’s title to lose.
Liverpool have lost Sadio Mane. Chelsea is recovering from almost going out of existence. United are starting from too far back. Tottenham are impressive but not in the same weight class. Arsenal are Arsenal. City, meanwhile, have only gotten stronger.
The Citizens have solved their one weakness – a clinical central striker – with the acquisition of the Tremendous Nordic Meat Shield that is Erling Braut Haaland. There will surely be a period of adaption between player and team, but once they find their rhythm, it’s all over for the rest of the league.
Aarav Raina: Man City. The best team in the league got the one thing they were truly missing in Erling Haaland. I am very scared of this team.
Garrett Burroughs: Man City feels like you’re fighting Mike Tyson in Punchout. Or you’re playing defense against Bo Jackson in Techmo Bowl. You get the idea. City wins by a decent margin.
Max Everett: Manchester City were a disgustingly overpowered team before they spent out and landed the Norwegian cyborg Erling Haaland. Now, it would be immensely dense to even suggest they wouldn’t be challenging for the title they’ve made a habit of collecting in recent years. That being said, Chelsea have added City’s former unsung hero Raheem Sterling to their squad, and he’ll be itching to get back at his former employers — that much Liverpool can attest. Kalidou Koulibaly is an immense replacement for the outgoing Rudiger and appears set to fortify an already impressive side. It’ll be between them two teams, but City take it again.
Alex Cervantes: Manchester City. Pep Guardiola’s side has so much depth, and while winning a third consecutive Premier League title is incredibly hard, I think the Citizens will be the first team since mid-2000s United to accomplish the feat.
Trey Daubert: Manchester City. City topped the table last year and made enormous editions this transfer window — most notably Erling Haaland, who just flat-out rocks. They have to be considered heavy favorites, no?
Gavin Daly: You can’t see anyone breaking the Man City and Liverpool dominance. Both lost players over the summer though and it may be a case of who recruited better. Nunez fits the Liverpool mold while Haaland is a break from the norm for City. That might not be a bad thing though, and if he can dominate as he has in other leagues, then it’s City’s to lose.
Who claims the other Champions Leagues spots? In order of league finish, please.
Jarrod: Liverpool are a dead certainty to finish in second place. Darwin Nunez is no Mane and is drastically overpriced, but he’s still a serious talent and there is more than enough around him to lock in another runners up place for the Reds.
I think Tottenham can sneak up into third place, I’m loving what Conte has done with this talented but traditionally flaky group. Their front three of Son, Kane and Kulusevski is phenomenal. In the Brazilian international Richarlison, they’ve bought a man that can play in any of those front three positions, giving Conte enviable depth and versatility in his forward line. Fellow signings Ivan Perisic and Yves Bissouma will have a field day playing behind this lot.
My pick for fourth may surprise people: Manchester United. Admittedly, this prediction is dependent on Cristiano Ronaldo moving on, thus allowing new boss Erik ten Hag to implement his preferred high pressing game. It’s also based upon an expected regression from a Chelsea side that is going through a little bit of transition both on the park and amid massive changes off of it. Despite some high-profile additions, Chelsea have lost some important players, especially defensively. That, combined with all of the off-field upheaval the club has experienced in 2022, will see them drop out of the top four.
Aarav: Liverpool, Arsenal, Tottenham
Garrett: Liverpool, Chelsea, Arsenal.
Max: Enter one of Chelsea or City, who take the second spot dependent on the title winners. From third onwards it’s Liverpool and Tottenham. Nothing else really to be said. United are in the midst of their Erik ten Hag rebuild but they sit in the same position as Liverpool a decade ago. A few more seasons being the bridesmaid and not the bride for the Red Devils. Arsenal won’t get anywhere with their internal structure such a mess; Arteta is a good coach but hasn’t done anything to convince me he’s better than a David Moyes in his seasons thus far. Who else is there that conceivably takes top four? No one for my money.
Alex: Liverpool, Tottenham, Arsenal
Trey: Liverpool, Chelsea, Arsenal
Gavin: Liverpool and Chelsea are the presumed easy picks, but this season could throw up a few surprises. West Ham has been knocking on the door, as have Tottenham, while this is the first full season of Newcastle’s new money and that’s without mentioning Arsenal or Manchester United. The last one will ultimately depend on if ten Hag gets the buy-in of the players. If I had to put money on it though, I’d pick Tottenham for 4th.
Who’s going down? Relegation picks, thanks.
Jarrod: Maybe it’s my royal blue tinted spectacles, but I believe Everton are staying up despite selling their best player in Richarlison, another injury to their only recognised centre forward in Dominic Calvert-Lewin, an unproven manager and an almost criminal mismanagement of the club by an incompetent board (rant over).
I think that Fulham are a sure bet to continue their annual tradition of swapping leagues with Norwich.
As for the other two relegation places, it’s a battle in three. Southampton will finally slip from lower mid-table anonymity to be right in the thick if a relegation battle. Leeds poor form to finish last term has been exacerbated by the sale of their two most important players in Raphinha and Kalvin Phillips. They’ve drafted in replacements, though they remain unproven. Finally, the Bournemouth side that gained promotion from the Championship last season bears a startling resemblance to the side that were sent down just two years ago.
Of those three, I think Leeds will stay up by the skin of their teeth.
Aarav: Bournemouth, Fulham, Leeds.
Garrett: Bournemouth, Fulham and Southampton.
Max: Fulham, Nottingham Forest, and Brentford. In and around the zone will also be Leicester and Southampton, but they have enough about them to stay up.
Alex: Fulham, Everton, Bournemouth.
TD: Nottingham Forest, Everton, Leeds.
Gavin: Fulham, Bournemouth, and Nottingham Forest will all go straight back down but they’ll drag Leeds, Southampton, Brentford, and Everton into it too. Both Forest and Fulham have recruited in goal high caliber Premier League goalkeepers in Dean Henderson (loan) and Bernd Leno respectively. If they are to have any chance of staying up, they’ll be vital.
Where will YOUR team finish?
Jarrod (Everton): I’d rather not think about that, thanks.
In all honesty, the defense will be a lot better than last season. The midfield needs a revamp and Calvert-Lewin’s injury means the team needs another striker not named Salomon Rondon.
On the positive side of the ledger, Tarkowski is a great signing and Lampard, despite his lesser managerial pedigree, simply can’t be worse that Agent Benitez. I’ll optimistically say 15th, but I’d be happy with 17th.
Aarav (Arsenal): My Gunners are finishing third. Sure, last season didn’t end how we wanted but you would have to be in denial if you couldn’t see Arsenal’s development. On top of that we made some tremendous signings with hopefully one more center midfielder coming. We’ve got a brilliant ball-playing defense, reliable midfielders, and both versatile and dynamic attackers. Not to mention, a coach who is going to become an Arsenal legend. This is our season.
Garrett (Chelsea): Chelsea is finishing third in the league.
Max (Tottenham): Tottenham should finish in the top four, but the reigning and defending champions of being ‘Spursy’ may well finish 21st in the EPL should they want to. I’d like to back them and say fourth, having no-nonsense Conte cracking the whip instills confidence for the first time in a while. Misplaced? We shall see.
Alex (Chelsea): I think Chelsea will finish somewhere in the realm of European qualification, but I’ll settle on fifth place and Europa League football for the 2023-24 campaign as a result. The Abramovich saga has come to an end, but the months-long process inhibited the club from gaining much traction in the transfer market. I love the signings of Raheem Sterling and Kalidou Koulibaly, but there are too many holes in the squad and not enough confirmed moves to ease any concern — Barcelona’s noted disruption of seemingly complete transfer deals has also hampered the Blues.
Trey (Arsenal-ish): I don’t think I have an official team, but I lean Arsenal since that’s the area I was in when I went to London for the Red Sox game. I also always use them for career mode in the FIFA video game. The top four is ours, baby! How can you not like their chances? The Gunners finished fifth in the table last year and added Oleksandr Zinchenko, Fabio Vieira, and the Brazilian Jesus. It’s time.
Gavin (Luton): Second… in the EFL Championship. COYH!
Which club will flatter to deceive?
Jarrod: Leicester City worry me. They fell away pretty sharply last season as injuries decimated an ageing and wafer-thin squad. The Foxes have responded to their lack of depth by signing precisely nobody at the time of writing. They’re also facing the possibility of losing long time goalkeeper and locker room leader Kasper Schmeichel.
Leicester’s reliance of James Maddison is almost laughable – 18 goals and 12 assists dwarfing anything his teammates contributed. Newly minted Newcastle is trying to pry the 25-year-old away from the Midlands via a £50 million bid. To this point the Foxes have remained steadfast that their talisman is not going anywhere.
Finally, I’ve never been impressed by Brendan Rodgers, a man who buys into his own legend a little too readily. If the Foxes can’t get off to a quick start, I’m expecting them to fall into the bottom half of the table.
Aarav: Chelsea is not it this year. Their defense is terrible after losing, in my opinion, two of the best center-backs in the world. Reece James can only do so much. Their attack has a few decent skillful players here and there but it’s not complete and definitely lacks a No. 9. Age has finally shown its colors a bit on Kante as well.
Garrett: Manchester United. Seems this way every year, just don’t like their squad this season.
Max: West Ham did well last season, but it won’t continue. Leicester will lurk around the relegation zone. Arsenal won’t be as good as AFTV hypes them up to be. Take your pick.
Alex: Is Chelsea an acceptable answer here? I’m going to say yes, even though I have them pegged for European football qualification. The aforementioned summer transfer catastrophe, apparent in-club drama, new owner Todd Boehly acting as interim sporting director — with Tuchel also aiding in the process — in addition to well documented troubles in the attacking third seemingly all seemingly spell disaster for the West London club. Chelsea is just two years removed from a remarkable Champions League winning campaign and retains most of the core from that run, and yet all hope seems lost with the season on the horizon. Stamford Bridge feels like a ticking time bomb.
Trey: Are we sure Manchester United is good? They already lost Paul Pogba and Christian Eriksen can’t replace him at this stage in his career. The Cristiano Ronaldo stuff is weird. They change managers every 12 seconds. They made some moves signing Lisandro Martinez and Tyrell Malacia, but I wouldn’t just bookmark them finishing in a Europa League spot again.
Gavin: It seems Everton is an easy pick for this but after last season, is it flattering to deceive or just the new norm for the Toffees? Brentford could have the second-season syndrome that saw Sheffield United go down a few seasons back. Also, Leicester is starting to slip.
Which club will prove a pleasant surprise?
Jarrod: Brentford, Crystal Palace, Brighton West Ham and Wolves all played above expectations last season. This time around, it’s tough to see where a surprise is coming from.
Do West Ham qualify if they simply hold onto their seventh place from last season? Probably not. Brighton and Wolves are in a similar position. Brentford are likely to slip a little without Eriksen pulling the strings from midfield. Aston Villa have spent a heap of money over the past couple of years – too much to be considered a genuine surprise packet. Newcastle have spent judiciously but are still expected to improve. They’re hardly a surprise, let alone a pleasant one.
Instead, let’s go with Palace. I picked them for relegation at the beginning of last season and was totally blindsided by not just their results, but the captivating – for Palace, at least – style of play they employed. Kudos to Patrick Vieira, who managed his troops superbly. I’m tipping them to continue their ascendancy and be this seasons Brighton, climbing into the top half of the table. Possibly at Brighton’s expense.
Aarav: I think Nottingham Forrest has something. Anything above relegation should be a surprise for them and I see them finishing around 15th and at the very least will be a tough out in most games.
Garrett: West Ham. Love Declan Rice a lot. I think his leadership, plus the young guys showing out, could earn them a Europa League spot.
Max: I somehow think Leeds are going to do something special (for them) and finish in the top ten. Other than that, I don’t think I genuinely back anyone to do anything out of the ordinary.
Alex: Give me Newcastle. The Saudi-led consortium’s purchase of the club has seen an influx of money enabling two successful transfer window spending sprees totaling £145 million. This summer the Magpies worked quickly to bolster their defense, acquiring Sven Botman, Nick Pope, and Matt Targett. Newcastle also appears hungry for some new attacking options, with links to Leicester’s James Maddison and Chelsea’s Timo Werner — although neither have reached advanced talks. The club finished 11th last season and are pegged to end the new campaign 13th, according to FiveThirtyEight. I figure the Magpies best last year’s finish and crack the top half of the table.
Trey: Aston Villa. Give me the over on where they finished last season. They will be better than 14th in the table. Boubacar Kamara is a stud.
Gavin: Fulham plays some nice football and will be easy on the eye to watch but it won’t be enough to keep them up. Vieira is doing wonders at Crystal Palace also. Watch out for them.
Golden Boot winner? And how many goals do they score?
Jarrod: That Spurs front line looks delicious. Kulusevski and Richarlison are brilliant players, but pale in comparison to Harry Kane and Heung-min Son. As Kane transitions into more of a deep lying forward, utilising his tremendous passing, look for Son to take over the mantle of main goal scorer at White Hart Lane (before you start, the new stadium is built on the same plot of land as White Hart Lane, so I’m calling it White Hart Lane). Son will end up with 23 league goals on the season.
Aarav: I think Heung-min Son will have another brilliant season netting 25 goals. Another year in the counter-attacking Conte system where he thrived should result in excellent continued production.
Garrett: Haaland nets 29 goals for City this year.
Max: Obligatory mention of Harry Kane, what needs to be said other than look at his resume. Son will have another good turnout, but I highly doubt he will be pipping an in-form Kane under Antonio Conte. Salah scores with ease but this will be the year where Liverpool realize the leg work Mane put in without the praise. If Ronaldo remains with United by some miracle, I.e., no top team wants to fork out millions on a 37-year-old, he’ll be up there.
But let’s be honest, if Haaland makes the adjustment it’d be stupid to bet against the machine, especially with De Bruyne feeding him. 21 goals for Haaland, 20 for Kane, 17 for Son and Salah respectively, and 16 for Ronaldo, or thereabouts.
Alex: Mo Salah, 23 goals.
Trey: Brazilian Jesus, 27 goals.
Gavin: If Kane stays fit, you’d be a fool to get against him. For Mo Salah it’ll be about how many penalties he can ‘win’. The outside bet would be Haaland in his first full season. If pushed on it, I’m saying Salah with 25 goals because I don’t think Kane will stay fit.
Which signing will have the most impact on their team?
Jarrod: The obvious answer is Haaland. His specific skillset is exactly what City were missing. And they were going along pretty damn well without him.
The cute answer would be Leno at Fulham. He’s a far better keeper than most give him credit for. He’ll steal a result or two for the Cottagers.
My choice will be Matinez at Manchester United. Sure, he’s small for a centre half at 5-foot-9, but Fabio Cannavaro and Franco Baresi are both the same height. They seemed to work out pretty well.
Like Cannavaro, Martinez is a prodigious leaper with great timing both in the air and on the ground. He’s strong as an ox and tenacious as all hell. With the ball, he’s a pinpoint passer and, being left footed, fills a very definite need in United’s defense.
He’s going to give United an edge they’ve lacked in defense since Namanja Vidic was in his prime.
Aarav: Gabriel Jesus, man. Arsenal has been in dire need of a legit striker and the Brazilian is the perfect fit to smash the ball into the net. With that critical component fixed this summer, Arsenal are top-four favorites and maybe outside the box title contenders as well.
Garrett: Is it unfair to claim Haaland as the biggest signing? City needed a striker bad and who better to fill the role than a 22-year-old megastar? I also love the Gianluca Scamacca signing for West Ham, and Vieira for Arsenal.
Max: This is between Ivan Perisic, Haaland and Sterling.
Perisic coming to Spurs reminds me of when we brought in Van Der Vaart — and what a player he was for us. Perisic will bring maturity, impact and most vital to us right now, title-winning experience.
I feel like enough has been said about Haaland, but I’ll justify it as it is. He is the new Lewandowski. His attacking awareness and relentless resolve means he will always be a threat. He doesn’t even need to do all the scoring, the defense will be focused on eliminating his threat, allowing City’s multi-dimensional attacking force to find weaknesses with others very capable of putting the ball in the net.
There aren’t many more a creative player in the Premier League with the goal-scoring prowess that Sterling has. His horrendous misses negate the perception of him as a goal-scorer but the fact of the matter is, he is a prime example of the modern inside forward, and his resume speaks for itself.
The impact of the above players largely depends on the way the club performs on the whole, a title winning City will have Haaland to thank, Chelsea and Sterling the same, Tottenham and Perisic will depend on how Spurs fare against their harder challenges.
Alex: Most impact is such a vague phrase to quantify, but if Chelsea are going to stay in the race for the top four, Koulibaly will play an integral role at the heart of that defense alongside Thiago Silva. I would also like to give a quick shout to Leeds signing Tyler Adams. He’s not a like-for-like swap of Phillips, but I really rate him as a holding midfielder and think he will thrive under Jesse Marsch, while also helping Leeds stay above relegation.
Trey: Haaland. City wins the Champions League, too.
Gavin: Lisandro Martinez. While I can still see Manchester United struggling, I believe Martinez could prove to be a future bright spot for the Red Devils, depending on where ten Hag utilizes him. Dropping in as a holding midfielder would probably best suit him in the Premier League, but as you can see from his stats, he more than holds his own against centre backs too.
The aerial presence will be a problem but the pressing and tackles along with passes attempted and completed could see him fill a Def Mid position United has struggled with in recent years.
And who will flop?
Jarrod: It’s not a flop, as such, but I think that Jesus will not live up to some of the more realistic expectations (ahem, Trey Daubert) being placed upon him. He’ll produce better numbers than he did at City, simply as a result of a significant increase in playing time. However, he will not have the same level of service that he enjoyed in the northwest.
He’ll likely top the 15 league goal mark, but is simply not the type or level of player that Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang or Alexandre Lacazette are. He’s a fine cog in a machine, but isn’t equipped to be a focal point of an attack.
Aarav: I don’t think Martinez is the answer for Man United at center-back. The EPL and Eredivisie are a bit different, and he truly has to be exceptional to prove that he was worth his hefty price tag.
Garrett: Jesus isn’t the answer for Arsenal like fans – Trey – think he will be.
Max: I have always found it an odd move for him and I’m putting bias to the side. But someone please tell me how Gabriel Jesus fits into the Arsenal system. People have clearly forgot he couldn’t unseat Sergio Aguero who was far more senior and, lest we forget, Guardiola didn’t even like Kun originally. Being the bigger fish in a small pond is going to expose Jesus, this move may even end his Premier League prospects.
I could always be wrong here. But there has yet to be anything from Jesus that shows he can be the sole striker for a big team, which Arsenal like to claim they are.
Alex: Truthfully, I was stumped for a long time trying to find a player who I think will flop. Unlike last season, there isn’t a guy that I believe is going to cave under the pressure of the Premier League. However, for the sake of the prompt, I’ll settle on Darwin Núñez.
The Uruguayan forward inked Liverpool’s largest transfer fee ever this summer and it’s a hefty price tag to live up to. I think Liverpool will experience some growing pains without Sadio Mane and Núñez will have some adjustments to make in his new league, too. I don’t think he’ll have a horrendous output — maybe 10-14 goals — but the 20-goal expectation everyone and their mother is billing him with is too much.
Trey: Raheem Sterling. I honestly never got the appeal with Sterling. I know he has stupid speed but that doesn’t account for the fact that he sucks basically everywhere else. His shot is garbage. Don’t think this one will go well. Pep got rid of him at the right time.
Gavin: Tyler Adams. I don’t even necessarily think he’ll be a massive flop but replacing Kalvin Phillips, who himself will have a task to replace Fernandinho at Man City, will prove too much for the American.
Who takes out the PFA Player of the Year?
Jarrod: Kevin De Bruyne. Again. Yawn.
Aarav: I don’t really think anyone stands a chance in the near future with Kevin De Bruyne at the helm of Pep Guardiola’s masterpiece of a team.
Garrett: This is the Erling Haaland’s world, we are just living in it.
Max: KDB is the safest shout.
Alex: Kevin De Bruyne. Call me biased, lazy, whatever, but the Belgian is the engine of a Man City squad that should repeat as Premier League champion.
Trey: Just rename it the Kevin De Bruyne award.
Gavin: The renamed Kevin De Bruyne award will go to… Kevin De Bruyne.
First manager to be removed by ‘mutual consent’?
Jarrod: I think that Ralph Hasenhüttl is on shaky ground at St Mary’s. Southampton have done nothing more that tread water under his tutelage. He’s a larger-than-life character and that’s surely taken the Saints to wins they otherwise wouldn’t have achieved, but his tactical naivety gets shown up time and time again. Personality works…for a while. Tactical nous lasts a lot longer. A slow start will see Big Ralph shown the door.
Although, keep an eye on Leicester and The Brodge. I’m not sure that everything is rosy in that particular relationship.
Aarav: I think Frank Lampard is gone soon. He barely did enough to keep his job, as well as Everton up last season, and I don’t think he’ll be as lucky this season.
Garrett: Frank Lampard at Everton. Sad to say, but….
Max: United have the turn-over to support this, maybe Ten Hag’s rebuild doesn’t go so well. Arteta is another who gets a sentimental pass when Arsenal fails, but they have to be more brutal and fix their internal structure at some point. Maybe this year, maybe not.
Alex: Frank Lampard … Everton is a mess.
Trey: The guy that manages Leeds (Jesse Marsch). He talked shit about Ted Lasso and almost got his ass relegated this past year. Phillips is now gone, too. He should have been fired already.
Gavin: With no business as of writing in the summer window, there has to be a relative unease from Rodgers at Leicester City. If the Foxes get off to a slow start, he could find himself packing his bags.
Speaking of slow starts, Everton manager Frank Lampard also can’t afford one and would be someone I’d keep a close eye on. It’s harder to pick since Watford got relegated that’s for sure.
Finally, your most outrageous prediction for the upcoming season.
Jarrod: Anthony Gordon to be possessed by the spirit of Andrei Kanchelskis and set Goodison Park alight. Everton’s new No. 10 will tear it up on either wing. His direct running and strong shooting will lead to a 20-goal season, and his crossing will make the fossilised remains of Salomon Rondon look somewhat animated.
He’ll force his way into Gareth Southgate’s England squad for the Human Rights World Cup. There, he’ll lead England to an upset win over Germany in the final, cooly converting a panenka to seal the penalty shootout.
Aarav: Died Spence, Tottenham right-back, will establish himself as one of the best attacking wing-backs in the league. And I mean up there with Trent Alexander-Arnold, Reece James, and Kyle Walker (yes, I know the last two are more outside center-backs right now).
Garrett: I have a few. West Ham to finish higher up the table than United; Antonio Conte blames ownership for his new signings not working out; and Leicester finishes in the bottom half of the table.
Max: I wouldn’t say this is outrageous, but I don’t think City beat the following teams: Liverpool, Spurs and Chelsea, at all throughout the year, despite being my pick to win the league. I’m not saying they’ll be beaten, but I see a lot of draws spread across the top four. Consistency is key, and City will be the most consistent.
Alex: Cristiano Ronaldo leaves before the conclusion of another Man United match after getting subbed off by ten Hag. In the days after, he’ll make some sort of demand to the Glazers, and after hours of back and forth, he’ll hop on a plane and announce he’s joining old teammates Gareth Bale and Giorgio Chiellini at LAFC.
Trey: Pep Guardiola realizes that Jack Grealish stinks and that Pep will be looking to get rid of him within the next year.
Gavin: With Liverpool top of the league come the winter break for the rescheduled World Cup, Jurgen Klopp will complain that there are more Liverpool players than City players at the World Cup (even if there are not) and claim it’s a fix by FIFA, UEFA, Premier League, and aliens.
Rafa Benitez will pop his head from under the desk, wipe his mouth, and shouts “Facts” before disappearing back under the desk. Liverpool fans will jump on board with this and claim they are the victims and threaten to boycott the World Cup which every other fan will encourage them to do.
They’ll lose the league by a point to Man City and blame Salah’s burnout from the World Cup — despite him not playing — and spending the time eating at McDonald’s and drinking sangrias leading to him coming back to training 30 pounds heavier. All I’m saying is it could happen. This is Liverpool, after all.
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