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My month of July hasn’t been great. On July 1st at approximately 6 PM my girlfriend of 11 months dumped me after I had already given her our 1
Wawa released a tweet on July 23rd that literally hopped out of my phone and repeatedly used my sack for a punching bag. Wawa has become the official hoagie of the Baltimore Ravens. This act of betrayal is worse than any heartbreak that I’ve encountered in my 23 years on this glorious planet, and on fucking Hoagiefest…you bitch.
I only have one question for you Wawa. Why the Ravens? I thought we were your birds? We are the birds. Is it because they have one more Super Bowl than we do? I just don’t know what to say to you right now. It’s like I don’t even know you anymore. What do they have that we don’t?! WE HAVE AN ACTUAL QUARTERBACK!! Is it because you like bad boys? We can be bad! Hell, we almost had a purge after we won the Super Bowl. I mean we could have one of our players murder someone like Ray Lewis did. I mean hell Desean Jackson is in a freaking gang! It’s over now. What’s done is done, and don’t you try crawling back. We just need time. I’m sorry…
Jackson Arnold: Will He Turn Things Around With Auburn? Jackson Arnold failed at Oklahoma. I’m just not positive it was actually his fault. This upcoming year, we’re about to find…
Should Connor McDavid Propose A Clippers Style Sign-And-Trade? Connor McDavid is the best athlete in any sport. He is an alien amongst men. The crazy part is, Leon Draisaitl was…
Sausage Party: Foodtopia Review Warning: I’m pretty sure this is the weirdest show ever created. I’m not sure if I should love it or hate it, but if you’re open-minded,…
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