Is Micah Parsons Flirting With OBJ?
It’s starting to get cold outside, which means it’s cuffing season for some. Micah Parsons wants a ring this coming year and he’s leaving no stone unturned to increase his odds of getting one. Odell Beckham is the diamond of the szn. The guy with the Bloomin Onion hair just helped the Rams lift the Lombardi and Parsons wants a piece of that action.
Is Micah Parsons flirting with OBJ? Some would say he’s playing hard to get but deep down we all know he’s so tempted to send a flurry of eggplant emojis to seal the deal.
Here’s Parsons on his I’m not recruiting but totally recruiting tactics.
“It’s not my obligation at all or I don’t feel obligated to do it,” Parsons said Wednesday, via Clarence Hill of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. “But if the guy on the market and he’s talking about he wants to play and he wants to win games, then shit, me too. I want to win it just as bad as you do. If you want to come and win games, come win games over here help us get to that bowl that you want. I want it.
“And shit, we can use him. I think he’s a great player. He’ll expand this offense. He’ll do more. He brings a lot. He’s a guy you want on the team. Beside all that critic stuff that people make up and shit about him, I think he’s a great dude from my experience with him and every time I see him. He can add real value to the team and help us do what we want to do.”
When there’s smoke there’s fire? Rumor on the street is OBJ doesn’t feel as frisky in the cold and if you want to shake his bones, it’s gotta be hot outside! The other rumor is that Zeke wants in. The only problem is that we’re not sure if his opinion still matters. The old wackadoo Jerry is the only one that still thinks he’s better than Tony Pollard.
Parsons isn’t the only one courting Beckham. Jerry Jones also has his eyes on the prize. Except somehow these two are on the same side here so I’m unsure of how to continue to make the metaphor work at this point. I could sit here and think about how to make a joke that beats the bar of a lame incest joke so I’ll get back to the sports thing now.
Hey, Dallas could use Beckham, if we’re being honest. It’s not a secret by now that the Cowboys miss Amari Cooper. Getting a guy like Beckham to spark the offense feels like a great fit. Especially when it feels like Dallas is a notch below Philadelphia at this point.