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LeBron James
(Bill Streicher/USA TODAY Sports)

Los Angeles Lakers Fans, Don’t Worry. I Can Fix Your Pathetic Team.

LeBron James
(Bill Streicher/USA TODAY Sports)

Los Angeles Lakers Fans, Don’t Worry. I Can Fix Your Pathetic Team.

Remember the good ol days for the Los Angeles Lakers? Starting as early as 1949 winning 4 titles in 5 years, going back to the 80s and the dominant run that Magic Johnson had won 5 titles between 1980 and 1988, then transitioning into the Kobe/Shaq/Phil era. Lakers fans have never really known what it’s like to be a poverty team. That is, until this season. The Lakers are a mere 25-27, good enough for 9th in the Western Conference. It wasn’t that long ago that this Lakers team, let by actor LeBron James and ADisney won the bubble chip in Orlando. What on earth has happened to this storied franchise we all love to hate?

Let’s look at some of their shortcomings this year. LeBron James has been his typical self, averaging 29/8/6 on 52/35/75 shooting splits. He continues to defy father time. But the rest of this team stinks. Anthony Davis can’t stay healthy, and even when he is on the floor he’s marginally better per PER than Dwight Howard. Then there is Russell Westbrook. LeBron brought Westbrook in and the experiment has been a disaster. See for yourself here. Not a single person can defend Westbrook anymore (seriously) and its a wonder he is still on this roster. The rest of the team reminds me of a YMCA 5 a side team made up of janitors, substitute teachers and those guys that “could’ve went pro if they didn’t *insert injury here*”.

So, here is what I will do for you, Lakers fans. I am going to put on my best GM hat and try and configure this Los Angeles Lakers team into something that slightly resembles a winning team. Because as it stands, this team doesn’t even make the playoffs.

Step 1: Immediately Trade Anthony Davis

Should the Lakers trade Anthony Davis?

The short answer? Yes.

The long answer? Hell yes.

Now, I am not here to slam anyone for being injury-prone. I used to be injury-prone in high school. I once broke my leg while playing football because I jumped up for a pass and landed in a hole in the ground and snapped my leg. Want to know the difference between ADisney and I? I kept playing Quarterback for another 45 minutes with a broken leg. ADisney would’ve been looking for the nearest medical professional. Yes, the Los Angeles Lakers won a title with Davis, but that was in the controlled environment in the bubble. Since then, the Lakers went 42-30 last year and got outclassed by the Phoenix Suns in the first round of the playoffs. Davis can’t be relied upon to stay on the floor or perform in key moments of a game. Teams, for whatever reason, would probably pay a kings ransom for the big man from Kentucky. Surround James with a bunch of shooters or a playmaking guard. I hear the 76ers have a guard that fits that description. Hell, I even traded Davis in a mock draft this past summer. The Lakers should take this trade in a heartbeat. Speaking of guards…

Step 2: Sell High On Talen Horton-Tucker

Can someone explain to me the hype around THT? I don’t get it. I watch this guy play and sometimes I wonder how he makes an NBA roster. You wanna talk about someone who can’t shoot (we will get another later), listen to these splits: 40/25/80%. I can’t wrap my head around giving a guy minutes that averages 40% from the field and a pathetic 25% from 3. Horton-Tucker is 322nd in the league in PER, similar to Thanasis Antetokounmpo. When you are playing similar to a guy like that, you know you absolutely stink. But somehow, he has trade value. Trade him to a sucker that will give up some sort of value for him and move on with your life.

Step 3: Run Russell Westbrook Out Of Town

I think it is safe to say this little Russell Westbrook experiment simply hasn’t worked. And that is putting it kindly. Westbrook can’t shoot. He can’t defend. He isn’t efficient with the basketball. What is the appeal? He runs really fast and can jump high? Pass. If you can’t win on a team with James Harden and Kevin Durant, you aren’t winning with LeBron James and Anthony Davis. When your PER is barely higher than a 37-year-old Carmelo Anthony, something is broken. You can not convince me that Westbrook is a winner on any team in the league, and he is just a poor fit for this Lakers squad. If you can’t move him for a bag of chips and 3 years of a stocked soda machine at Crypto.com arena, then just cut him. Send him to play in a league in Turkey. Just don’t let him suit up for your team after the All-Star break.

Step 4: Maybe Get An Adult To Be The Head Coach?

Frank Vogel is…doing his best for the Los Angeles Lakers. But let’s be honest, he is just the scapegoat for this team. We all know the real head coach for the Lakers is LeBron James. I guarantee you if you bring in someone who actually commands respect from a team and doesn’t look like someone who sells Apple Care in a Best Buy, maybe this team would show more fire and effort on the floor. Who is the right guy? Great question. I mean Erik Spoelstra led that Miami Heat team to two championships. Because he is a leader. Bring in a guy with a backbone and this team will be 100% different. It will be like night and day, I promise you. Vogel stinks. A guy with a career record of 423-367 is supposed to lead this team? Give me a break.

I think I might be a fortune teller. Above, I wrote that the Los Angeles Lakers championship window is slammed shut. That statement is even more prevalent right now. This team just isn’t built to make a long run in the Western Conference. Teams like the Suns, Nuggets, Warriors, Grizzlies, and Jazz beat this team in a 7 game series. Hell, even Dallas or the LA Clippers beats this team right now. Unless this team heeds my advice and makes some major changes, they will be in a rut and waste the remaining golden years of LeBron James.

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