Sports Media

Jameis Winston Can Now Read License Plates And Street Signs

Trey Daubert / NFL / April 29, 2020

Jameis Winston Can Now Read License Plates And Street Signs

Everybody is SCREWED now! Jameis Winston can see now! Winston just threw for over 5,000 yards and couldn’t see. No, I’m not kidding. Winston got Lasik eye surgery this offseason and is a totally different man. One that can see! Winston says that he can now read street signs and license plates he could not see before.

Jameis Winston on Zoom call with Saints media, about Lasik surgery, said he can now read license plates and street signs that he couldn't read as well before. Helps with blurriness, depth perception, clearer vision.
— Greg Auman (@gregauman) April 29, 2020

Full quote from Jameis Winston on LASIK surgery, and how one example of how it helps him now is that he can read license plates if an uninsured driver hits him and drives off: pic.twitter.com/OJEfnvwinn
— Greg Auman (@gregauman) April 29, 2020

I just want you to think about this. Jameis Winston threw for 5,109 yards and 33 touchdowns without being able to see. It just so happened that he threw it to the other team 30 times. Can’t I chalk up half of those to poor vision? Seriously, this is a big deal.

Don’t believe me? Josh James is a pitcher for the Astros. He was a no-name prospect throwing an easy 91 MPH getting smoked. They fixed his snoring issue. Now James tops 100 MPH. Not a joke, look it up. Stop snoring, become MLB pitcher. Fix vision, throw 50 touchdowns?

Jameis Winston Isn’t That Bad

Auman also said in a flurry of tweets that Winston is going full vegan. He only cheats on Saturday. I’m not sure I trust that move. Hey, it’s the effort that counts. Winston wants to get better. Winston also wants to wear number 2. He couldn’t at Florida State because that number is off limits because of Deion Sanders.

I think it has to say something about Winston that he signed with New Orleans. He took basically no money for the opportunity to learn from Sean Payton and Drew Brees. The Rennaissance act for Winston is something I can’t wait for. Oh, I CANNOT wait! I hope the haters are officially nervous.

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