Hockey Guy Trey Goes For Fantasy Glory S2: You’re Dead
Dude, bad news… you’re dead!
Hockey Guy Trey returns for season two. Last year, we had a battle mantra. Don’t let hockey guy Trey in the dance. My hockey brain was slowly growing and by the end of the season, I pretty much knew what I was doing. I squeaked into the playoffs and found a way to win it. Trouble was coming.
This year we have a new mantra. Season two is about pain. Season two is about annihilation. Season two is about winning.
My feelings are valid because I am smart. Shame on anyone for thinking anything else. They’re poison and ain’t nobody got time for that.
I can do anything I put my mind to. I’ve realized not everyone can actually say that. I can. Two years ago, I couldn’t name you ten hockey players. Now I feel like I’m more qualified than Kelly McCrimmon is to be the general manager of the Golden Knights.
This didn’t have to be the case. They could have let HGT die and never regain his love for hockey. I thank the haters for that. One too many people told me I couldn’t win because I didn’t know anything about hockey. I did what I always do. I took it personally. Even after I won, they said it was all luck. They should have never did that.
I have put together a fantasy onslaught that will probably never be repeated. With one day to go in the regular season, the Icing Daubert squad is on the verge of a 22-1 season while having an average margin of victory of 96.1.
How they were acquired:
Draft – 15:
Trade – 3
Waiver Wire – 6
The squad we have has been a juggernaut all season. We like to think of ourselves as the 2007 Patriots that decided it was smarter to just get the loss out of the way now during the year. We feel confident about not only finishing the job, but hammering that Irish fuck in the Finals (if he has the courage to make it there).
Side note: Gavin would love if I hammered him… but we won’t go there for today.
There is only one thing left to do. Avenge our one stupid loss on the season. I want my hockey tickets, Gavin.
In all seriousness, I now love fantasy hockey and hockey in general. Fuck the NBA. Feed me the NHL all day. It’s been one of the greatest gifts ever. We will attempt to have a Vendetta league next year.