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How I Would Run The Colorado Rockies


The Colorado Rockies are arguably the least successful franchise in any sport. This would be my plan if I were to take over. (Matt Kozlowski)

How I Would Run The Colorado Rockies

The Colorado Rockies have never won the World Series and I’m not sure they ever will. In fact, you can make the argument that the Rockies are the least successful MLB franchise that exists. The Rockies have NEVER won the NL West. Never. Zero division titles since the club was founded in 1991. Does it get worse than that in any sport?

We know that some of this isn’t the Rockies fault. It’s a small market and free agent pitchers never really want to sign with you because of the ballpark. The hitters are expected to put up monster numbers and even then they’re just labeled as a product of Coors Field. The Rockies job is unlike any other that exists in sports.

If this isn’t rock bottom than I don’t know what is for this franchise. The players mock them and the team is coming off a 68 win season. Worse yet, there isn’t a single young player that the fans can even rally behind. What do you do buy a Kris Bryant jersey? As if that isn’t a constant reminder to not be pissed off that Nolan Arenado isn’t just on the team?

Colorado is a lost franchise and I’m willing to help. They tried the Moneyball stuff by hiring Harvard grad Jeff Bridich but he turned out to be dumber than rocks. His resume includes letting DJ LeMahieu walk just to overpay Daniel Murphy. He also gave way too much money to Ian Desmond in a move no one understood at the time. They also replaced Bryant with Arenado as I said earlier. A lot of these Ivy League guys don’t actually understand baseball.

Coors Field plays tricks on your brain. I’m here to argue that it’s time to start playing fire with fire. I am here to argue there isn’t a single person that’s ever been in charge of the Rockies that has ever had a true understanding of how to build a title winning team in this ballpark. The results show that to be the case. I refuse to believe it’s impossible to win a championship with this team and I just want the opportunity to execute my vision. Maybe one day the Rockies will be smart enough to hire me so that I can try to do just that.

Milo has done plenty of blogs on the Coors effect. This is a pretty good blog done by the University of Colorado on it. You can do more research on the science behind it if you want. Long story short; the ball travels further here. Science! Jazz hands!

If the ballpark is so different from every other park that exists, why are the Rockies just going about business as usual? Why wouldn’t you ever try to truly build your team to maximize the science behind the ballpark. I’m talking about by using street smarts, not analytics.

I believe that the Rockies should go unconventional because the environment they exists is unconventional. For timekeeping purposes and having the ability to keep some secrets to myself when called upon, I will lay out my plan by providing a few bullet points.

All outfielders must be speed demons

If he doesn’t run like Ricky Henderson, he can’t play for my team. Well, in the outfield anyone. This club will prioritize one thing and one thing only. Covering as much outfield ground as possible. I will trot out three Jackie Bradley’s if need be. I care only to have a team that can track the most amount of fly balls as possible. Preferably we can win the scouting battles and our first round picks would go toward players like Justin Crawford and Enrique Bradfield. You can Google them to see what I mean. I want speed demons only in this outfield. Nothing else matters as much.

No pitchers throw over 92 MPH with the exception of two or three relievers to throw off the rhythm

Why would I build a normal rotation in this ballpark? What’s the point? Why even try? Why not mix and match a bunch of broken parts to find the perfect solution? Yes, this sounds crazy in theory but I bet you this would work.

Speed demons in the outfield with a miss mosh of pitchers that throw junk. Nestor Cortes would be perfect for this team. The faster the ball goes in, the faster it goes out. No point in velocity when it goes back out faster. We could turn this into a circus and watch Coors Field turn into a can of corn.

Yes, you’re still going to give up homers but as long as you’re finding guys who are limiting walks while pitching to contact, I don’t see why this couldn’t field positive results. Mix it up. Have some sinkerballers. Find the offspeed wizards that create weak hit fly balls. We want at least two knuckleball guys and we’re going to do everything we can to find as many of them as we can. By the time it starts getting cold outside, this is going to only play more and more into our favor.

I know it sounds crazy. I know it sounds ridiculous. That’s fine. However, I’d argue that what the Rockies are doing isn’t working and has pretty much shown zero examples of ever working. Who’s to say this whacked out theory couldn’t win ONE division title? This is the pathway for the Rockies. It’s the only pathway for the Rockies.

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