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If You’re Mad At Simone Biles, Please Go Fuck Yourself

Simone Biles
AP Photo/Natacha Pisarenko

I don’t get it. I truly just don’t get it. Simone Biles withdraws from the Olympics for HER mental health, and everyone else loses their shit.

Where Do You Get Off?

Biles is hands down the greatest gymnast in the world, even I know that. The things she is doing are so dangerous that if anyone else did them, they would die. For some reason, you think you know better than she does.

How does that make sense in your brain?

And we get it, you’re edgy and cool, and you would have gone pro, but the coach played favorites. No, wait, that’s not true. The truth is you sucked and don’t have one-one hundredth of the athleticism Simone has in the nail of her pinky toe.

Losers that peaked in high school on J.V. don’t get an opinion here.

People need to understand that these athletes have feelings too. Simone Biles doesn’t owe you shit. If she decides she isn’t in the right state of mind to compete, only SHE gets to make that decision.

She Is Not Soft

It’s mind bottling (Talladega Nights reference). The same people saying she is soft for backing out of the competition to get her mind right are the same people that will call out of work on a Monday just because they “don’t feel up to it today.”

Too bad so sad, you better get your ass out of bed and go clock in, pussy. If you’re allowed to take a mental health day from mopping the floors at Jo-Ann Fabrics, Biles can take however many she sees fit at the Olympics.

The worst part is it’s basically the same shit you did with Naomi Osaka. It’s fucking disgusting. You pricks learned nothing.

I may not know shit about gymnastics or tennis, but I’m an fucking expert at minding my own fucking business. So, take my advice. The next time a top athlete decides to step back from competition for mental health reasons, just shut the fuck up and go fuck yourself (also, your mom’s a hoe).

P.S. If you like sarcastic assholes that are sort of funny on occasion, follow me on Twitter (or don’t. I don’t care).

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