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It wasn’t me, it was my butt! That’s what Cam Heyward is saying.
Let me catch you up to speed. In case you missed it, Heyward got caught slipping on the internet. Heyward’s butt did all the talking in this one. Well, that’s what he wants you to believe anyway.
I believe Heyward. He totally didn’t call Tomlin a clown. He’s not allowed to but I am. We know the truth here. He’s a dinosaur living in the past. Convinced us Mitch Trubisky was good enough. His defense just got carved up by the Bills and Josh Allen while entering the week as 14 point dogs. TJ Watt is hurt. This season is in the toilet.
Maybe Cam didn’t say all this? Maybe his butt truly did do all the talking? Maybe Cam Heyward has a magical pooper? All I know is if that monster of a man says he didn’t do it, then I sure as hell am not going to question him. Momma raised that man to be a killer and I want no part of being on Heyward’s bad side.
Instead, let’s talk about how awesome Cam Heyward is. If his butt wants to rip Mike Tomlin, I say we allow it. After all, what exactly what the Steelers do without him? Can you imagine their run defense without the former Ohio State product? Yeah, that’s what I thought. If we’re just being honest; Heyward has been saving Tomlin’s a** for years.
In other butt related news, you’re welcome.
Hey, we’re all trying really hard. Life is tough. Butt retweets happen. There isn’t anything Cam Heyward could have done about it. It’s hard enough playing for this poverty franchise that employs Mitch Trubisky. Let the man have his butt retweets. It’s all the good people of Pittsburgh have left.
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