Brittney Griner Released; Trade Winners & Losers

Earlier today, 12/8/22, it was announced that the US and Russia agreed to terms on a blockbuster trade. The US has agreed to trade veteran terrorist Victor Bout and in exchange, Russia has Brittney Griner released from jail. Let’s review the winners and losers.

Biggest Winner

Brittney Griner: This one is nice and easy. Brittney Griner gets to return home to her friends and family. When you consider the alternative, being locked in a literal gulag, I’m sure no one is happier than Griner right now. This is like being traded from a winless team to the team that is favored to win the *checks google* WNBA Championship Trophy (this thing seriously doesn’t have a name?).

Biggest Loser

The United States: Let’s be honest here, although I’m happy Brittney Griner is released, the trade value isn’t matching up. We basically gave up a Hall of Fame terrorist for what should be the sweetener on the end of the trade package.

We got fleeced by Russia here.

Victor “Merchant of Death” Bout is worth multiple veteran spies or the equivalent in draft picks. I’m talking multiple first-rounders.

This is like if the Chiefs traded Pat Mahomes for Nate Herbig. Next time Biden is at the negotiating table he needs to bring Howie Roseman with him. Roseman would have gotten us a James Bond-caliber spy, a first and second-round pick, Brittney Griner released, and a conditional POW in World War III.

Think I’m wrong, ask Jon Robinson.

TTFN

I’m happy Brittney Griner no longer has to battle it out in the gulag to redeploy. Anyone that thinks that she should spend nine years in Russia’s ass crack over a vape pen is nuts, but Russia definitely took our lunch money in this deal.

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