Kumar Rocker
(Bruce Thorson/USA TODAY Sports)

The Boston Red Sox are practically unwatchable this season. Their hitting has been inconsistent at best, stagnant at worst. The pitching staff looks like a AA rotation wondering what they’re doing pitching at Fenway Park. Boston sits at last place in the AL East at 7-18; even the Orioles are ahead of them. They are tied for the worst record in the American League.

Thankfully, this misery is confined to a 60-game season. I would absolutely rather have the Red Sox be terrible over 60 games than 162. But, if the Red Sox are going to be this bad, I want them to just go all the way. Even with expanded playoffs, there is no chance they make it. If you’re going to be this awful, make sure you get the presumptive #1 overall pick for 2021. Set your sights on Kumar Rocker.

Please Draft Kumar Rocker

Rocker is a RHP entering his junior year at Vanderbilt University. And he’s a beast. The 6-5 flamethrower already made headlines in his freshman season after tallying 19 strikeouts in a no-hitter against the Duke Blue Devils in the Super Regionals. Some called it the greatest performance ever by a college pitcher. Vanderbilt would go on to win the 2019 College World Series over Michigan. Kumar Rocker is as close as it gets to a sure thing prospect. I would even be willing to say he’s the biggest can’t-miss player since Bryce Harper was coming up. The dude is that good.

Rocker boasts a mid-90s fastball that can top out at 98 miles per hour. His slider and changeup mix the pitch selection well enough to keep hitters off balance. While command was potentially a concern, it has become less so as Rocker has moved through his career at Vandy.

The Red Sox pitching rotation is unbearably terrible. Barstool Sports personality and Red Sox die-hard said it best when he tweeted this:

Kumar Rocker would provide an instant jolt to the Red Sox pitching pipeline. Don’t let this terrible season be in vain. Tank for Rocker.